In Dreams

an X fanfic

by Serenade

This story features adult content.

Spoilers for the end of the Tokyo Babylon manga.

Insert standard disclaimer here.

Always, in darkness he came.

Only after Subaru had finished performing his nightly rituals of bathing and changing and meditation, only after he had switched off the lights and lay sleepless on his narrow, comfortless bed - only then did he appear.

Even with eyes closed Subaru knew the shape of that face and form, hovering above him like a hawk balanced in the wind. Subaru could reach out and touch a bare shoulder, feel solid and supple flesh beneath his fingers. And he could breathe a name, and be answered with a tender, deadly smile.

Subaru had spent his whole life enmeshed in the currents of magic. He knew full well that none of the Dragons of Earth could breach the wards around the Imonoyama mansion. But all the same, every night, the Sakurazukamori was there, insinuating himself into Subaru's dreams. He didn't know anymore if it was real or illusion - a maboroshi created for just the two of them, or merely his own fevered fantasies. It made little difference.

Subaru welcomed the night.

Tonight he was restless, sleep eluding him despite all his efforts. The green blinking of the clock by his bed informed him it was two a.m. Subaru groaned softly and buried his head beneath his pillow. It was suffocatingly hot, but it brought him no closer to the sweet shelter of oblivion. In frustration Subaru cast both pillow and sheets to the foot of the bed. He stared up at the dim ceiling, a hot prickling in his eyes.

A soft voice chuckled in his ear. "Are dreams your only escape, Subaru-kun?"

Subaru did not turn his head. "Dreams," he whispered, "are all I have left to me."

He closed his eyes at the touch of the other's hot breath against his neck, tilting his head back in silent submission. He allowed his wrists to be captured as lingering kisses were pressed against the hollow of his throat, the skin beneath his jaw, the sensitive crease behind his ear. His body tingled with remembered and anticipated sensation, as though a fire were being slowly stoked within him.

Hands traced their way down the flat of his chest; he could not recall being undressed but realised his shirt was a tangle halfway down his arms. The Sakurazukamori was a dark shadow stretched over him, caging Subaru in with his body. Subaru could only breathe in rough gasps as those expert hands mapped their way over his skin, taking possession of surrendered territory. Still, he made a sound in the back of his throat when he felt invisible fingers sliding around the waistband of his pants.

The Sakurazukamori leaned in close, eyes gleaming in the darkness. "Do you want me to stop?" he purred. Subaru said nothing, but twisted his body in silent supplication.

"I thought not."

A warm mouth sealed itself over Subaru's, as though to stifle any cry of protest or pleading. It was more a claiming than a kiss: relentless, insistent, thorough. Even as Subaru was consumed by the heat rising beneath his skin, he felt hands tugging smoothly on his pants, sliding them down over his hips. He arched his body upwards reflexively to allow them to come off.

The Sakurazukamori stroked Subaru's face gently with the back of his hand, gazing down at him all the while with a faint smile of appreciation. "You make a beautiful plaything, Subaru-kun."

A flare of anger shot through Subaru. They both already understood the game being played out; there was no need for embellishments. Some of it must have shown in his eyes - his eyes had always given away his heart - for the Sakurazukamori's smile hardened to steel. His hand gripped Subaru's shoulder and turned him inexorably to the side, until Subaru lay flat on his stomach. Subaru's breathing fluttered rapidly in the knowledge of what was to come.

The Sakurazukamori bent over Subaru, his hot breath sending involuntary shivers down the back of Subaru's neck. "You are mine," the whisper came. "And I can do whatever I like with you." A strong hand pinned Subaru's wrists together down onto the bed. "And I can do whatever I like to you." A thick finger brushed across Subaru's lips, which parted automatically. It slid deep into his mouth, past the second joint, up to the third, probing the warm, wet depths. Subaru washed his tongue around it, rubbing along the knuckle, the underside, even across the hard, sharp nail. By now the stirring in his groin had flowered into a slow, sweet ache.

The Sakurazukamori withdrew his finger from Subaru's mouth, a moist sucking sound accompanying its release. "So compliant, Subaru-kun," he said, amusement in his tone. "Do you think I'll be kind to you because of it?"

"I don't expect anything from you anymore," Subaru said.

"That can't be true." The Sakurazukamori traced his fingers deliberately along the inside of Subaru's thigh, rotating in delicate, maddening circles; Subaru was unable to suppress a muted whimper.

The Sakurazukamori smiled. "I think you do want something from me, Subaru-kun."

Subaru lay like a doll on the bed, his face pressed against the woven fibres of the sheets. The sweat condensing on his bare back trickled down the lines and hollows of his flesh whenever he shuddered. He could feel, more immediately and intimately than anything else, the pressure of the Sakurazukamori's fingers inside him, slicking deep into that narrow, tight channel. It was agonisingly exquisite torment, and Subaru writhed his hips in a futile attempt to achieve release. His own arousal pressed into the mattress beneath him; with his wrists pinned captive above his head, Subaru was powerless to ease that terrible ache. All he could do was twist helplessly, at the mercy of his enemy.

Subaru almost cried out when the Sakurazukamori pulled away from him, but managed to choke it back. He turned his head sideways to see the figure of the other man poised above him: a dense, dark presence with a pitiless smile.

"Did you want to say something, Subaru-kun?"

Subaru made no response, but he could only guess at the expression on his face. Desire swam thick in his blood like a toxin, dissolving all coherent thought. Behind him, Subaru could feel a heavy erection being pressed against his thigh. His heart pounded in delirious dread.

"Well?" the gently mocking voice inquired again. When the tip of a swollen sex touched his moist opening, Subaru quivered like a tautly stretched drumskin. He bit down on his lip to keep from betraying any sound, but even so a soft moan escaped him.

"Say it," the voice coaxed lovingly. "You know I won't do it unless you say it."

"P-Please," Subaru whispered, hoarse with uncontrol. "Take me - you know you will anyway - I will always b-belong to - "

"I know," said the Sakurazukamori, and plunged himself deep into Subaru's spread body.

Nothing short of death could have held back the scream ripped from Subaru's throat. As it was, he see-sawed on the brink of unconsciousness, the violent intensity of this invasion almost too much to bear. He was restrained beneath the powerful weight of the other man, impaled and helpless to prevent his slow violation. Tiny sobs shuddered from his mouth with each drawn out, deliberate thrust.

"S-Seishirou-san..."

"You think so?" said a voice like black silk. "Poor Subaru-kun. That's why you will always, always fall to me."

An arm slipped under his chest, holding him fast while the Sakurazukamori ruthlessly slaked his desire. Subaru gasped as the warm, wet rush of seed flooded into him. In shameful response, his own body spasmed with release.

The sound of their shared breathing filled the room. Subaru lay spent, with no energy left to move or speak. It was only after some minutes that he realised he was shaking, shaking with suppressed sobs.

The Sakurazukamori traced a hand across the tears tracking thin lines down Subaru's face. "Why are you crying?"

"Because you murdered my sister," Subaru whispered. "And still... I still..." He reached out a hand towards the man looking dispassionately down at him, as though to grasp at a star.

But the Sakurazukamori merely smiled, shadows swirling around him, masking him from view. As Subaru watched, the figure dissolved entirely, like ashes melting in the rain. He was left staring stricken into the darkness, only the marks of sex upon his body giving sign of the night's encounter.

Subaru cried out in anguish, and finally broke into violent weeping. He clutched the empty sheets against himself, tears soaking into the fabric. Only after many long minutes did he collapse again, exhausted, staring up at the ceiling with dull eyes.

Out of the darkness, a soft breeze touched his cheek in a phantom caress. "Sleep," murmured a voice from the darkness.

Subaru sank back into the confines of his dreams.